Theme III: Relationships/Sex | A Personality Test with an NYU Thrust

by The Under the Arch Staff

Drawn by Chloe Smith

Drawn by Chloe Smith

Even with all the serious learning that happens here, NYU has a sexy side too. Find out which personality matches you, and make sure to let the world know in the comments section below.

“I AM A(N)…”

“Albert”
Every semester, your partner reserves one special night where, after months of careful planning and anticipation, everything fails.

“Bobst”
Your lower levels remain open twenty-four/seven to service. But you’re not the cheeriest partner to be with. Frequent participation may lead to depression.

“NYU Football Team”
Look, whatever your reasons, you’re choosing abstinence. We respect that.

“Weinstein”
You’ve always known the top floor is lacking. All the good stuff is obviously downstairs. Except when you partner wants a slurpie.

“Bobcat”
You’re a sexual panther, and everyone loves you. Just be careful not to…Tear It Up.

“WSP Fountain”
You’re flexible and fluid. Enough said.

“RA”
You hold BASE meetings. Particularly those that go from first base, to second base…

“Tischie”
You fake it ‘till you make it.

“Sternie”
You understand the importance of a firm handshake and maintaining eye contact. You go in knowing exactly what your strengths and weaknesses are. Start to finish should last 30-45 seconds, the approximate length of an elevator pitch. And you never forget to leave a resume and send a thank you note the next day.

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3 comments

  1. Jackie Leal · October 2, 2013

    HAHAHA!

  2. Charlie Maizon · October 5, 2013

    This is… this is just awful.

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